From Teenage Pen Pals to Nearly 30 Years of Marriage: The Story of Chad and Alena Benson

The relationship between Chad and Alena Benson, which began with a letter, developed into a lifelong partnership. The couple, who became pen pals at age 17 in 1986, is currently celebrating almost 30 years of marriage. Alena, originating from Singapore, started the correspondence, sending letters to various individuals globally, including Chad, who was from Plymouth. Alena, 55, stated, “I just sent it for the fun of it, not thinking that I was going to get a reply.” Their exchange of letters grew significantly from their initial communications. Chad, a Plymouth City Council gardener, described his family by saying, “My mother and father are self-employed fishmongers, and they own a shop in Stoke selling wet fish, shellfish, smoked fish, and also they fry fish and chips for their customers.” Alena characterized her home, stating, “I’m living in a small country called Singapore, very far away from England, but looking at the world’s map, you can see that Singapore is surprisingly, very, very tiny.” Their letter exchange persisted throughout the late 1980s, and in 1993, Alena, a nurse, chose to visit Chad, her pen pal, in the UK. Alena explained, “I just wanted to travel, so it was just a stopover to come and see him.” Upon their initial meeting, Chad, 56, remarked, “She was just drop-dead gorgeous, I thought, ‘Oh my. She can’t be my pen pal.'” Although the visit lasted only 19 days, they recognized their connection transcended mere friendship. Following Alena’s return to Singapore, the two commenced daily phone conversations, notwithstanding the substantial expenses. Chad recounted, “My mum said, ‘Chad, you’ve got to pay this bill off’.” He added, “I think it was about £350 a quarter or something like that.” Additionally, they began sending each other cassette tapes containing conversations, with over 100 tapes exchanged between them before their relationship underwent a significant development. In February 1994, Chad traveled to Singapore to visit Alena and proposed marriage, overcoming initial objections from her parents. She stated, “I said I would not marry anyone else and they realised it was serious and they didn’t stop me.” Alena relocated to the UK in 1995, bringing along all the letters and cassettes they had exchanged. Both acknowledge that younger generations, accustomed to social media, struggle to comprehend their connection forming through the highly analogue medium of letters. The International Youth Service, the organization that facilitated the letter exchange, has subsequently ceased operations. Their marriage took place on 17 February 1996, two years after Chad’s trip to Singapore, and they now have three children. Chad, who mentioned he still listens to the cassettes at their residence in Yealmpton, Devon, commented, “At the end of the day she’s my best friend.” Alena responded, “And you’re my best friend.” Their wedding, a modest event with a budget of £2,000, signified the completion of their ten-year progression from pen pals to married partners. For further updates, BBC Devon can be followed on X, Facebook, and Instagram. Story ideas can be submitted to spotlight@bbc.co.uk. Copyright 2024 BBC. All rights reserved. The BBC disclaims responsibility for the content found on external websites. Information regarding their external linking policy is available.