Supporting Those Experiencing Loss During the Holiday Season

Many families gathering around the dining table on Christmas Day may experience a sense of absence when they observe the space where a loved one once sat. Sisters Hope and Katie Smith, who lost their father earlier this year, described this vacant spot at the table as a distressing symbol. In response, they established “An Empty Chair,” an initiative designed to alter the perspective for individuals navigating life after bereavement, providing a forum where people can discuss their loved ones and openly acknowledge their struggles. Hope stated, “Katie and I luckily had our family and had each other but for so many people they don’t have that.” She added, “We just thought it would be lovely to have an event that people could attend where you can either sit and listen or share your thoughts.” Hope also noted the positive atmosphere, saying, “Even though it’s such a sensitive subject, there’s actually a lot of laughter, joy and gratitude at our events and we want people to leave feeling less alone.” Mother and daughter Angela and Sarah Creighton attended An Empty Chair’s Christmas-themed event and expressed comfort in being in a room with others experiencing similar emotions. Sarah commented, “Nanny and granda were old. But grief is still very destabilising.” She further explained, “It still comes as a shock and you don’t know how you’re going to feel.” The event took place at Banana Block, in east Belfast, and featured speakers who shared their personal narratives of loss and love. These events invite individuals to attend and listen, with no obligation to speak. Susan Gorman, whose father passed away four years ago when she was 28, described her first Christmas without him as challenging. She articulated, “I feel that if I can share any tips, it would be nice to share them with people who’ve gone through similar things.” Gorman continued, “Grief and joy kind of go side-by-side. As much as we had a massive day for our wedding I was very aware that my dad wasn’t at it too.” She concluded, “It’s about giving yourself permission to still enjoy life after loss.” Moira Boyd and her daughters, Ailise and Justine, experienced the sudden loss of their father and husband two years ago. Boyd mentioned that attending the event offered a collective activity for her family, as they were navigating their grief together. She expressed, “It’s coming up to the time of year when the chair is empty.” Boyd added, “Honestly at the minute I just want Christmas to be over, I wish Christmas didn’t exist.” Copyright 2024 BBC. All rights reserved. The BBC is not responsible for the content of external sites. Read about our approach to external linking.